Sunday, April 1, 2012

Tears

As I sit here this morning trying to push on with the day my heart is so heavy the tears just will not stop flowing. Please Goddess I need my girls to find the way home. They are so lost in the world of drugs I can't make this better no matter how hard I try. Then there are the Grandchildren. I feel so terrible. I didn't think I could take on the task of raising them so my oldest daughter and her husband have stepped up. Now I feel I've failed her as well ; because I couldn't and she did. What kind of Mother does that make me? I feel like I failed them all. I think this may just be the worst day of my life. I begged my daughter to please go to the Salvation Army. They have a program I hope will help. We don't have the funds for fancy Betty Ford rehab type centers so this is our last chance.I don't know how to get on with life until this resolves itself. I need to figure out how to step up for the Grandchildren. I need...... I just don't know what I need now. My heart aches. :-(

2 comments:

  1. oh my what can one say? It's their path to find - if only you could release the so-very-useless feelings of guilt. Where is the father?

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  2. My heart will be beside you. I am still in danger of loosing my youngest to drugs. My prayers and thoughts are with all of you. It is a hard road. We can only do what we can. I didn't and still don't have the money to put my son in somewhere, but praying that whatever program he tries will help him win the battle. I have many days where I feel like a failure about this and then I have a day that I realize that I have done all I can. Love and hugs dear friend. I am here for you.

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